If you want to identify me, Ask me not where I live Or what I like to eat, Or how I comb my hair but ask me what I am living for, in detail and ask me, What I think is keeping me from living fully for the thing I want to live for?
Thomas Merton
Matthew 13:44-45
44″The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field.
45″Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls.
So the question we need to ask before we go any farther is
HOW BAD DO YOU WANT IT?
“The reason we are not able to see God is the faintness of our desire.”
Meister Eckhart
A Rule of Life seeks to answer two question:
Who do I want to be?
How do I want to live?
Synthesized
How do I want to live so I can be who I want to be? (Ruth Haley Barton, Sacred Rhythms)
A Rule of Life is a simple pattern of attitudes, behaviors, and practices that are a regular routine and are intended to produce a certain quality of life and character. (Ruth Haley Barton, Sacred Rhythms)
It’s really important when crafting your rule or rhythm that you do a couple of things.
Be Holistic – Pay attention to all the areas of formation:
Spiritual (Restore)
Missional (Serve)
Relational (Love)
Mental (Restore)
Physical (Restore)
Emotional (Restore, Love, Serve)
It takes time
You should explore a variety of disciplines so that you can get a sense of their meaning for your life and how you might incorporate them realistically into your life. This takes time and experimentation so that you can arrange them in a way that fits your life.
Don’t just practice them once but at least 6 weeks.
It’s Personal
Your rule/rhythm is very personal. Taking into account your:
- Your Personality
- Spiritual Pathways
- Season of Life
- Sin
- Work and Home life
- Where God is trying to stretch you
- This means it needs to be realistic based on your stage of life. We are not monks and nuns.
Embrace the challenges and opportunities.
Balanced with disciplines that come naturally and stretch us.
A “rule” should be flexible and remember, it’s a living document.
Don’t become rigid and legalistic.
And reflect and evaluate every 6 months.
It’s all a gift from God, God’s Grace.
Dallas Willard says this,
“Saints burn way more grace than sinners ever could.”
Grace is God doing for us what we cannot do on our own.
Writing a Rule of Life
What are your minimum daily/weekly/monthly/yearly requirements for ongoing spiritual transformation? (Ruth Haley Barton, Sacred Rhythms)
Questions to work through:
What do you want from God? Where do you want to change? Where do you feel powerless to change? Ask for grace, for God to help you with what you cannot do through effort alone.
What practices will I engage in on a daily basis? Weekly? Monthly? Yearly?
Where will I practice these disciplines?
What time of the day/week/month/year?
What disciplines will I practice in community and how will I practice them?
When and where do you feel most connected to God? What disciplines do you connect for with based on your personality type and spiritual pathway? Pay attention to the experiences, practices, and relationships that draw you towards God. Incorporate these in your rhythm.
What practices are more difficult but you sense God inviting you to for growth?
Are there any particular practices needed for a specific need, sin in your life, or negative pattern?
What are you currently doing to realize your goals and longings? Which of these things help and hinder your spiritual transformation?
FINALLY
Choose disciplines that arise from your desire for God’s transforming work in your life. Make sure the suit the limits and realities of your life and our holistic, pay attention to all the areas of your life:
Spiritual (Restore)
Silence and Solitude
Prayer
Meditation
Examen
Discernment
Worship
Missional (Serve)
Service
Compassion Ministry
Evangelism/Discipling
Justice
Stewardship
Truth Telling
Relational (Love)
Community
Discipleship
Hospitality
Mentor/Spiritual Friend/Spiritual Direction
Small Group
Confession
Mental (Restore)
Study
Memorization
Physical (Restore)
Rest
Diet
Exercise
Emotional (Restore)
Counseling
Humility
Reflection
Examen
Suggested Reading
Wisdom Distilled from the Daily: Living the Rule of St. Benedict Today by Joan Chittister
Sacred Rhythms by Ruth Haley Barton